Lots of teenagers face challenges when it comes to popularity, looks, height, weight, grades. I mean the list goes on and it’s different for every person. We can generalise these all down into lack of confidence. One of the hardest things an average teen has to go through is secondary school, one person looks at a teen and they're sent into a frenzy of blushing and self-pity. Insecurities are built into every human being, it’s a natural feeling like you’re not as good as others. As students we try to be better at everything we do but when it comes to something we can’t change it causes extreme doubt and lots of teens become self-conscience. As a teenager I’ve had my fair share of insecurities but I know I’m not alone with 87 percent of teens wishing to alter their appearance.
What does it actually mean to be insecure? We hear the word thrown around in so many circumstances that it sometimes becomes daunting and everything is a bit of a blur. Being insecure is when someone is uncertain or anxious of oneself; not confident. It means someone constantly doubts themselves and their abilities. The main thing that comes to mind when I think of the word is not being good enough. Someone feels inadequate, causing them to worry and constantly feel like someone is watching over them and judging their every move. Being insecure is the most common problem within teens but that does not mean it should be normalised.
There is lots of things that cause insecurities. Childhood experiences, failure and rejection, loneliness, social anxiety, perfectionism and critical people in your life. Just to name a few. Let’s venture into more detail about how each one of these effects a person and why. Childhood experiences causes insecurities because it restricts them from being stable and safe. when a person is young this shapes who they are, if a person feels unsafe or something suddenly changes in their life it leads to major personal issues. Failure and rejection leads to insecurities as the person no longer feels good enough, they feel they can’t do something, that everyone else can. Loneliness; if a person has no one around them to support or make them feel good about themselves then they start to feel like no one thinks they are worthy of their friendship. Perfectionism; this is one I relate very closely with as I always feel as if things have to be perfect, like the world will end if my highlighters aren’t arranged in rainbow order. This is the feeling that if someone isn’t perfect, they have to change themselves to be this way. Which is impossible because nobody’s perfect.
Insecurities lead to lots of mental health issues. Such as: Anxiety, Depression, Paranoia and Addictive personalities. Anxiety is one of the leading mental health issues stemming from being insecure because it’s literally the feeling of worrying. Being self-conscious is the act of worrying about what others think of someone. It’s like every single thing that happens sends them on a tangent of questions. A thousand questions cram into a person’s brain causing them to doubt and dislike themselves. A lot of teens find it difficult to speak out about these problems as they feel their just going to be another teen trying to be ‘relatable’ or ‘trendy’ as they see people make jokes and find it humorous to make fun off and pretend to have mental health Illness as they don’t understand what it is really like. It’s easy to say love yourself but it’s harder to find things to love about ones self.
No one can ever feel completely secure in themselves, if you meet anyone that tells you other wise, they're probably lying. The real achievement is not to overcome but to tolerate these things, learn not to love them but to understand how they better us. As well as, knowing that being insecure makes us human, no day to day human wakes up and looks like a barbie doll. It’s not normal; as humans we create ridiculously high expectations that we will never reach and we need to learn to accept this and move on. If we all looked exactly the same, well, it would probably just be creepy. So stop comparing yourself to others and expecting every curve and crevice of your body (and mind) to be perfect. Give yourself a break and seek help if you feel too overwhelmed.
