Houses on Blackbrook Lane have been increasingly distressed by an aggressive, yowling visitor, who grabs any opportunity to cause chaos.
Mrs Hodgson, 62, came downstairs one morning to find her own kittens terrified by the predator cat stalking the kitchen floor. ‘I think I left the bathroom window open, and it somehow jumped in!’ she explained. ‘It’s hard to feel safe now, knowing that it could come in at any time. My cats are quite distraught.’
But what can residents do to protect themselves, their children, and their pets from the evil intruder?
1. Prevention is key.
Lock all windows and doors before leaving the room, the house, or going to bed. Intruder cats have adapted to knock open ajar windows and slip through tiny cracks.
2. Have tools on hand.
A water pistol may be all it takes to scare away the intruder. Alternatively, make yourself as big as possible and shout loudly. Expletives optional.
3. Assess the threat.
Sometimes cats are in the mood for violence. If this seems to be the case, your safety is the main priority. Gather up your children and pets, and retreat slowly.
4. Train your own pets.
Your pets hate this intruder as much as you. Train your hamster to be a guard dog.
5. Create a family night-watch timetable.
Cats are diurnal, so most active at dawn and dusk. Therefore, you and your family are most vulnerable when you’re asleep. Draw up shifts so that someone is always alert and ready.
6. Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
The best way to keep an eye on this creature of evil would be to imprison it in your own home. Keep it there with regular food and water and attention. Portray it to your friends as the charitable act of adoption. Only you will know the truth.
Have you been visited by an intruder cat? Let us know your tactics for keeping your family safe. Meanwhile, residents are advised to take all precautions to prevent becoming the victim of this merciless trespasser.
