Tartan **

THOSE who are up on their Police Academy trivia should know the director here - one Bobcat Goldthwait.

Thankfully the dialogue doesn't comprise the incomprehensible screeches that his hick character Zed became known for.

But in some parts it may as well be, as we're treated to the aftermath of a woman's particularly grotty college secret when she grapples with whether to be "totally honest" with her current beau.

The gross-out scenario aside, we're not treated to any interesting exchanges between the pair.

You might say it's realistic in that we could be watching two normal people converse.

The trouble is, normal people are so horribly dull.