The dark, dirty blight on society

9:22am Tuesday 5th December 2006

By Faye Duxberry

Research shows that one in four women experience domestic violence during their lifetimes.

Beneath this statistic is a hidden world of fear, loneliness and suffering.

In Hounslow alone there have been three domestic violence murders in the last 12 months and behind closed doors thousands of women are facing daily nightmares of abuse.

The Crime and Drugs Audit 2004 stated that domestic violence makes up 49 per cent of all violent crime in the borough and many cases are not being reported.

Christine endured 30 years of abuse. She had grown up in a loving family and when she met and fell in love with Daniel at the age of 19 she did not expect her life to become a downward spiral of violence and manipulation.

After their marriage and the birth of their baby daughter, Daniel became possessive and controlling. He did not let her visit her parents and took away any money they sent her. When Christine fell pregnant again Daniel refused to believe the child was his and accused her of being a useless mother.

Then the physical violence started. When he hit her for the first time Christine was shocked and ashamed but Daniel said it would never happen again.

In reality Christine was subjected to outbursts of extreme violence and stripped of her self-esteem and strength by her husband's behaviour.

One night Christine woke as Daniel poured methylated spirits all over her. She lay petrified while he stood over her throwing matches at her soaking body. Each match he threw went out as it fell but he only stopped when his young son ran in and his daughter called the police.

When Daniel was arrested he telephoned the children in tears telling them to ask their mother to get him out and Christine felt she had no choice but to drop the charges and take him back.

Years passed and the children went to university. With no friends and no one to turn to, Christine felt more isolated than ever. She found a job as a volunteer for the National Trust but one evening she got home late after missing the bus and Daniel attacked her.

She was at rock bottom. That night she tried to kill herself by taking an overdose. She lay on the sofa for three days drifting in and out of consciousness and the only time Daniel spoke to her was to call her lazy for not going to work as he walked in and out of the room.

Her children became concerned at her not answering the phone and called an ambulance. Christine stayed in hospital for six weeks but when she returned home because there was no space at the local refuge she was attacked again.

Christine's story is typical of the cases women all over the country are experiencing. This has been mirrored in crime audit figures, which have identified high levels of domestic violence on a national scale.The picture is bleak but the message in Hounslow is clear:help is available for victims and domestic violence will not be tolerated.

For Christine, her 30-year ordeal is now over. Daniel was arrested and she obtained an injunction to keep him away from the house and filed for divorce.

When the case came to court, Daniel was acquitted but Christine finally managed to pack her bags.

She stayed with her son until she given a one bedroom flat of her own and was told she could claim for criminal injuries. She was awarded £9,000 for the mental stress, physical injury and sexual assault she had endured.

"I broke down and fell to my knees", she said. "It was the first time that anyone had actually said that they believed me. I had finally got some justice."

The doctor prescribed exercise for Christine and she started going to the gym and losing weight. When she took part in the Hydroactive Challenge, she ran the three kilometre course in 33 minutes and her children were waiting for her at the finishing line.

Now Christine is looking to the future.

She said: "I have a new man in my life now. We were friends before anything happened but now he tells me I am beautiful every day.

"I finally feel cherished and can see that what my parents had was real and that I can have it too.

"I want women reading this to realise that no matter how long it takes you to make a decision about your life, you can do it and it's worth it."

Permjit Chadha, senior community safety officer at Hounslow Council, echoes these sentiments and is committed to helping women free themselves from domestic violence, which includes physical, emotional, psychological, financial or sexual abuse.

Women can also be forced into marriages, which is a form of domestic violence more prevalent in Asian communities, and some arrive here from abroad and suddenly find themselves trapped in an abusive relationship. These victims are dependent on their partners for money and told that if they speak out about their suffering they will be deported back to their country or origin, where the fate that awaits them is often no better.

Miss Chadha wants to reassure victims that there are steps they can take to stop the abuse no matter what their circumstances and people out there who will listen, offer practical and emotional support and take action.

Hounslow is tackling domestic violence through agencies working together, which means there is a staggering amount of expertise and options available to victims through the police, criminal and civil courts, the council, health services and voluntary organisations.

Many women are too scared to report domestic violence crime to the police or there may not be enough evidence to take the case forward but accessing civil remedies is also possible. A non-molestation order or an occupation order can be imposed to prevent perpetrators from harming the victim or living in the home at risk of their behaviour becoming a criminal matter.

The first refuge in the world opened in Chiswick in 1971 and has been helping women to escape from violent homes.ever since. A more recent development has been the domestic violence outreach worker, who is able to support and work alongside the police to advise the victim and take care of her emotional needs.

The multi-agency approach is well thought-out and has been designed with the protection of victims and their families in mind, always treating their safety as a priority and coming up with a practical plan to ensure this.

Miss Chadha said: "The first thing anyone should do is believe the woman because a lot of research is saying that women are put off accessing services because they feel they're being judged and not being taken seriously.

"There are loads of different dynamics involved and reasons why women can't leave so one of the things I need to do is make sure that we increase the safety of women and children when they are living in the domestic violence situation.

"And also when they're leaving because the most dangerous time for a woman is when she's actually left or is about to leave or there are issues around contact - that's when the majority of women are killed."

The three domestic violence murder victims in Hounslow were not known to the services and this highlights the problem of women suffering in silence until it is too late.

Miss Chadha also says that it is very common for women to start drinking and taking drugs as a way of coping with and burying the domestic violence so working with the drug and alcohol services is vital.

Health visitors have a key role to play in domestic violence work as they have a genuine reason for being in the home and seeing a woman on her own, meaning they can pick up on what is going on.

Shockingly a lot of domestic violence starts or escalates during pregnancy and so maternity services will always routinely screen for domestic violence by asking a few simple questions.

Every month the domestic violence risk assessment panel meets to discuss the most serious cases and the most appropriate remedies.

If a woman is living in social housing and her partner is coming to the property and inflicting domestic violence, the housing provider could take out an anti-social behaviour order against him for reasons like causing distress to one of their tenants or neighbours complaining about noise.

When children are living in a home where domestic violence is happening, the case will be referred to social services as a child protection issue, which takes priority over anything else.

Miss Chadha said: "We need to safeguard our children. Children are vulnerable and they need adult protection and guidance and if their parents, for whatever reason, are unable to do that then we have our specialist services that will kick in."

The idea is not to pressurise the woman to leave her home but rather to take the perpetrators out of the situation.

Through the Hounslow Safer Homes project, doors and window locks can be changed to secure the property against the perpetrator coming back. A sanctuary room is also created within the house as a safe place for the women and children to go to if the perpetrator does get in. Measures for this room include reversing the door with the hinges on the other side so that it is more difficult to kick in, having a telephone point there and putting in a solid door that takes at least 45 minutes to break down, by which time the police will be on the scene.

A pilot Fones for Safety scheme has also been launched in Hounslow whereby old mobile phones are reconfigured into personal alarms so that pressing any number on the phone will take the person straight through to the emergency services.

The victim's details have to be registered with the police so they are flashed up as a priority domestic violence case along with any known information about the offender such as involvement in firearms so that police know what to expect when they reach the home.

But there is also an emphasis on challenging how people think about domestic violence and ending the cycle of abuse the perpetrators themselves are locked into by encouraging them to seek help rather than being ordered to go on a programme.

By going into 35 Hounslow schools with a project called Learning to Respect young people are being educated about the nature of healthy relationships.

At primary age children are asked to consider questions like what characteristics are important to them in a best friend. When the project transfers over to secondary schools the debate is much more direct with students discussing whether it is acceptable to hit a partner and considering specific situations.

The project has been very successful in educating children about domestic violence, winning a Mayor of London award for its outstanding contribution.

Hounslow is also looking to set up a programme for children who have experienced domestic violence, which will run alongside a group for mothers to talk about the issues their children are raising.

Miss Chadha said: "I can't imagine what it would be like to live in a family where there's violence if you're a child.

"We need to give them the opportunity to talk about their experiences and also learn that it's not actually normal.

"Domestic violence is really widespread so we don't want women to think they're alone in this but that they can come forward because it's not a taboo subject anymore and we are taking it seriously."

· Domestic Violence Outreach Worker 020 8754 3319
· Pukaar - counselling service for Asian women and girls experiencing violence - 020 8577 6059
· Freephone 24 hour National Domestic Violence Helpline 0808 2000 247
· Refuge's community outreach service - 020 8742 7745
· Police Community Safety Unit - 020 8721 9104
·Broken Rainbow - for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people who experience domestic violence - 08452 60 44 60
· In emergency please dial 999

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