Bromley woman says aliens are helping fix economy and have advice for Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger

This Is Local London: Aliens known as Reptilians and Grays have been communicating with Stephany Cohen about the economy and Arsene Wenger. Aliens known as Reptilians and Grays have been communicating with Stephany Cohen about the economy and Arsene Wenger.

WITH George Osborne set to announce the annual budget tomorrow, a spiritual healer from Bromley says aliens are guiding the economy towards recovery, and have some important advice for Arsenal football manager Arsene Wenger.

Stephany Cohen is in constant communication with extra terrestrial races, including Grays, Cat People and the half-reptile, half-alien Reptilians.

The 52-year-old former policewoman says Reptilians, who are highly skilled in business and finance, have taken a special interest in Britain's faltering economy, and are trying to help.

She said: "The people of Britain need not be too down - Reptilians are helping.

"They are working with people's minds, in the background, to steer the economy in the right direction.

"It is a very bad time for everyone but recovery will happen in its own time, at the right time."

While it may not be suprising that George Osborne's economic policy is influenced by giant lizards, perhaps we should find comfort in the fact there is a superior race looking after us.

The selfless aliens travel regularly to Earth from their home in the Canis Major system, which also homes Grays and Cat People.

And Ms Cohen, of Durham Avenue, says Grays regularly pass on advice, intended for struggling Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger.

She said: "The Grays offer guidance to Mr Wenger.

"At the moment they are telling him he needs to get rid of a whole lot of people and bring in a stronger squad - especially in the defence.

"He also needs to let assistant manager Steve Bould do his job.

"Mr Wenger likes to do everything but he is not good at everything."

Ms Cohen, who discussed her alien connections on This Morning last week, admits she possesses a physical relationship with Grays, who give her orgasms.

She says her appearance on This Morning resulted in an increase in alien activity, which is the reason for the unfavourable weather of late.

She said: "Aliens have been travelling from other planets to Earth because they knew I was on This Morning.

"That has been the reason for the bad weather recently - to cover up the alien ships.

"They have been bringing young aliens to see what I was saying in the studio - like a school trip from other planets.

"Their ships hide because they do not want to be bombed out of the air - they know most of us do not understand what they are about."

Ms Cohen has just started working on her autobiography, which begins with her first encounter with Grays in Negril, Jamaica, in 1986.

Comments (48)

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1:25pm Tue 19 Mar 13

hereallweek says...

And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed.
And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed. hereallweek
  • Score: 0

2:43pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Eagles_Man says...

Is this the NewsShopper website or The Daily Mash?

I have trouble telling the difference sometimes.

Gave me a chuckle, but so do people who believe that the arrangement of the stars has a bearing on things, or the work of supernatural omnipotent beings...
Is this the NewsShopper website or The Daily Mash? I have trouble telling the difference sometimes. Gave me a chuckle, but so do people who believe that the arrangement of the stars has a bearing on things, or the work of supernatural omnipotent beings... Eagles_Man
  • Score: 0

3:28pm Tue 19 Mar 13

ksc says...

This lady was a Police officer, I can see it now... "officer, someone nicked my telly" and the reply comes "don't worry sir the aliens need the transmitter for communication with their home planet, they tell me they will return it when the message is received, they will leave it on E-Bay, move along now".
This lady was a Police officer, I can see it now... "officer, someone nicked my telly" and the reply comes "don't worry sir the aliens need the transmitter for communication with their home planet, they tell me they will return it when the message is received, they will leave it on E-Bay, move along now". ksc
  • Score: 0

4:00pm Tue 19 Mar 13

reasonable75 says...

WTF is all this bollix

Come on NS, surely you can find something better when your short of news - perhaps a missing dog (would be better than this)
WTF is all this bollix Come on NS, surely you can find something better when your short of news - perhaps a missing dog (would be better than this) reasonable75
  • Score: 0

4:05pm Tue 19 Mar 13

the wall says...

Canis Major is Latin for greater dog but has 'Cat People' lving there. LOL

Former policewoman, I would like to hear the story behind that. What she invited to leave?

NS you are better than this.
Canis Major is Latin for greater dog but has 'Cat People' lving there. LOL Former policewoman, I would like to hear the story behind that. What she invited to leave? NS you are better than this. the wall
  • Score: 0

4:21pm Tue 19 Mar 13

the wall says...

Inspirationalady28 - Is that you?
Inspirationalady28 - Is that you? the wall
  • Score: 0

4:33pm Tue 19 Mar 13

PaulErith says...

Isnt this the same sort of stuff that David Ike preaches? Remember when he went from the well respected presenter of Grandstand to declaring he was the son of god on the Wogan show! Showing my age now!
Isnt this the same sort of stuff that David Ike preaches? Remember when he went from the well respected presenter of Grandstand to declaring he was the son of god on the Wogan show! Showing my age now! PaulErith
  • Score: 0

4:34pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Oldchap says...

Former policewoman?

Wonder why she left
Former policewoman? Wonder why she left Oldchap
  • Score: 0

4:36pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Erith chap says...

Hahahahaha
Hahahahaha Erith chap
  • Score: 0

4:43pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Dreamsofnurse says...

Oh dear. OK, so long as she's not out there hurting anyone.
Oh dear. OK, so long as she's not out there hurting anyone. Dreamsofnurse
  • Score: 0

4:46pm Tue 19 Mar 13

R_U_Serious says...

"Ms Cohen has just started working on her autobiography, which begins with her first encounter with herbal cannabis in Negril, Jamaica, in 1986."
"Ms Cohen has just started working on her autobiography, which begins with her first encounter with herbal cannabis in Negril, Jamaica, in 1986." R_U_Serious
  • Score: 0

5:01pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Marty1979 says...

She's a "spiritual healer" - does that provide her income or are we all paying her (benefits)?
She's a "spiritual healer" - does that provide her income or are we all paying her (benefits)? Marty1979
  • Score: 0

5:12pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Dreamsofnurse says...

Just been watching a recording of her TV interview. She's obviously not well, and they really took the P.
Just been watching a recording of her TV interview. She's obviously not well, and they really took the P. Dreamsofnurse
  • Score: 0

5:15pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Marty1979 says...

Oldchap wrote:
Former policewoman?

Wonder why she left
One of the earlier NS articles says police worker, not police woman

Maybe she was a clerk or whatever
[quote][p][bold]Oldchap[/bold] wrote: Former policewoman? Wonder why she left[/p][/quote]One of the earlier NS articles says police worker, not police woman Maybe she was a clerk or whatever Marty1979
  • Score: 0

5:40pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Gypo.Joe says...

Stephany this is what happens when ya puff too much skunk gurl.
Stephany this is what happens when ya puff too much skunk gurl. Gypo.Joe
  • Score: 0

5:41pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Inspirationalady28 says...

What planet is she from?
What planet is she from? Inspirationalady28
  • Score: 0

5:44pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Gypo.Joe says...

Inspirationalady28 wrote:
What planet is she from?
Uranus !
[quote][p][bold]Inspirationalady28[/bold] wrote: What planet is she from?[/p][/quote]Uranus ! Gypo.Joe
  • Score: 0

5:45pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Inspirationalady28 says...

the wall wrote:
Inspirationalady28 - Is that you?
Lmao!!! How could you think that's me?
[quote][p][bold]the wall[/bold] wrote: Inspirationalady28 - Is that you?[/p][/quote]Lmao!!! How could you think that's me? Inspirationalady28
  • Score: 0

5:47pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Inspirationalady28 says...

Gypo.Joe wrote:
Inspirationalady28 wrote:
What planet is she from?
Uranus !
Lol!!
[quote][p][bold]Gypo.Joe[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]Inspirationalady28[/bold] wrote: What planet is she from?[/p][/quote]Uranus ![/p][/quote]Lol!! Inspirationalady28
  • Score: 0

5:55pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Inspirationalady28 says...

Arse..ne Wenger?? I'm beginning to see the connection now.. Balls!! And as for ****.. OMG! My sides.. Lol
Arse..ne Wenger?? I'm beginning to see the connection now.. Balls!! And as for ****.. OMG! My sides.. Lol Inspirationalady28
  • Score: 0

5:57pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Inspirationalady28 says...

Hey! NS put about the orgas.. but they starred mine out!!
Hey! NS put about the orgas.. but they starred mine out!! Inspirationalady28
  • Score: 0

6:43pm Tue 19 Mar 13

paulbexleyheath says...

"shes a nutter"
"shes a nutter" paulbexleyheath
  • Score: 0

7:11pm Tue 19 Mar 13

jaded1 says...

I can believe the bit about lizard aliens but she got silly when she claimed Arsene Wenger was going to buy some decent defenders.Much too far-fetched!!
I can believe the bit about lizard aliens but she got silly when she claimed Arsene Wenger was going to buy some decent defenders.Much too far-fetched!! jaded1
  • Score: 0

7:28pm Tue 19 Mar 13

bizzymum says...

OK, someone run this past me again. The Grays are from where and do what??????????

So want one - anyone know where you can find them ;)
OK, someone run this past me again. The Grays are from where and do what?????????? So want one - anyone know where you can find them ;) bizzymum
  • Score: 0

7:32pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Marty1979 says...

bizzymum wrote:
OK, someone run this past me again. The Grays are from where and do what??????????

So want one - anyone know where you can find them ;)
You want an alien org (word that'll get deleted)?

Or you want a Gray as a pet?
[quote][p][bold]bizzymum[/bold] wrote: OK, someone run this past me again. The Grays are from where and do what?????????? So want one - anyone know where you can find them ;)[/p][/quote]You want an alien org (word that'll get deleted)? Or you want a Gray as a pet? Marty1979
  • Score: 0

8:04pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Oldchap says...

Isn't Grays near Barking .....

(I'll get my coat)
Isn't Grays near Barking ..... (I'll get my coat) Oldchap
  • Score: 0

8:13pm Tue 19 Mar 13

bizzymum says...

Marty1979 wrote:
bizzymum wrote:
OK, someone run this past me again. The Grays are from where and do what??????????

So want one - anyone know where you can find them ;)
You want an alien org (word that'll get deleted)?

Or you want a Gray as a pet?
I'll have a pet please Marty. I'm sure they amount to the same. x
[quote][p][bold]Marty1979[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]bizzymum[/bold] wrote: OK, someone run this past me again. The Grays are from where and do what?????????? So want one - anyone know where you can find them ;)[/p][/quote]You want an alien org (word that'll get deleted)? Or you want a Gray as a pet?[/p][/quote]I'll have a pet please Marty. I'm sure they amount to the same. x bizzymum
  • Score: 0

10:08pm Tue 19 Mar 13

banjo8 says...

She looks a little bit alien herself. Where does NS find these people?
She looks a little bit alien herself. Where does NS find these people? banjo8
  • Score: 0

10:34pm Tue 19 Mar 13

Downhamgirl says...

ksc wrote:
This lady was a Police officer, I can see it now... "officer, someone nicked my telly" and the reply comes "don't worry sir the aliens need the transmitter for communication with their home planet, they tell me they will return it when the message is received, they will leave it on E-Bay, move along now".
LOL
[quote][p][bold]ksc[/bold] wrote: This lady was a Police officer, I can see it now... "officer, someone nicked my telly" and the reply comes "don't worry sir the aliens need the transmitter for communication with their home planet, they tell me they will return it when the message is received, they will leave it on E-Bay, move along now".[/p][/quote]LOL Downhamgirl
  • Score: 0

12:05am Wed 20 Mar 13

pamela8 says...

They took the p out of her on tv now the papers ,,can,t someone close to her explain that shes making a fool of herself...Its possible that she may be on the verge of some kind of break down...I feel sorry for her....she needs some kind of support...
They took the p out of her on tv now the papers ,,can,t someone close to her explain that shes making a fool of herself...Its possible that she may be on the verge of some kind of break down...I feel sorry for her....she needs some kind of support... pamela8
  • Score: 0

8:52am Wed 20 Mar 13

banjo8 says...

I'm not so sure about that, I think she's generally happy with her lot in the world. It's just that her world is a little bit different to everyone else's world.
Still think she looks like an alien herself - perhaps it's in the genes.
I'm not so sure about that, I think she's generally happy with her lot in the world. It's just that her world is a little bit different to everyone else's world. Still think she looks like an alien herself - perhaps it's in the genes. banjo8
  • Score: 0

9:38am Wed 20 Mar 13

Gypo.Joe says...

pamela8 wrote:
They took the p out of her on tv now the papers ,,can,t someone close to her explain that shes making a fool of herself...Its possible that she may be on the verge of some kind of break down...I feel sorry for her....she needs some kind of support...
Leave the woman alone, sounds like she is getting plenty of 0rgasms....are you ?
[quote][p][bold]pamela8[/bold] wrote: They took the p out of her on tv now the papers ,,can,t someone close to her explain that shes making a fool of herself...Its possible that she may be on the verge of some kind of break down...I feel sorry for her....she needs some kind of support...[/p][/quote]Leave the woman alone, sounds like she is getting plenty of 0rgasms....are you ? Gypo.Joe
  • Score: 0

9:46am Wed 20 Mar 13

highway warrior says...

Bit too early for an April Fools story isn't it??
Bit too early for an April Fools story isn't it?? highway warrior
  • Score: 0

10:19am Wed 20 Mar 13

rescaaffering oldey says...

hereallweek wrote:
And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed.
...sussed you a long time ago 'tom' still... keeping your brains where the monkey keeps his nuts!! rofl!! :)
[quote][p][bold]hereallweek[/bold] wrote: And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed.[/p][/quote]...sussed you a long time ago 'tom' still... keeping your brains where the monkey keeps his nuts!! rofl!! :) rescaaffering oldey
  • Score: 0

12:39pm Wed 20 Mar 13

Tip-Top says...

It's a shame these Aliens etc can't teach her to make a decent breakfast!!!
It's a shame these Aliens etc can't teach her to make a decent breakfast!!! Tip-Top
  • Score: 0

7:03pm Wed 20 Mar 13

jay2180 says...

LOL WTF NEXT....DROP ME RIGHT OUT...TYPICAL ..HA LOL HA..
LOL WTF NEXT....DROP ME RIGHT OUT...TYPICAL ..HA LOL HA.. jay2180
  • Score: 0

9:19pm Wed 20 Mar 13

banjo8 says...

Is she definitely talking about ****, perhaps she said organisms and the reporter misheard her?
Is she definitely talking about ****, perhaps she said organisms and the reporter misheard her? banjo8
  • Score: 0

1:04am Thu 21 Mar 13

pamela8 says...

Gypo Joe...you just can,t help yourself can you...I have noticed with you that you still feel the need to try and lower the tone whether its something like this story or even in a sad case where someone has lost their life.....what does that say about you.....not much except a void heart and an empty soul....
Gypo Joe...you just can,t help yourself can you...I have noticed with you that you still feel the need to try and lower the tone whether its something like this story or even in a sad case where someone has lost their life.....what does that say about you.....not much except a void heart and an empty soul.... pamela8
  • Score: 0

5:46pm Thu 21 Mar 13

reasonable75 says...

banjo8 wrote:
Is she definitely talking about ****, perhaps she said organisms and the reporter misheard her?
I think you heard right - perhaps the earth, and other planets, moved?
[quote][p][bold]banjo8[/bold] wrote: Is she definitely talking about ****, perhaps she said organisms and the reporter misheard her?[/p][/quote]I think you heard right - perhaps the earth, and other planets, moved? reasonable75
  • Score: 0

5:53pm Thu 21 Mar 13

jay2180 says...

WHO'S THE ALIEN IN THE PICTURE??!!..I CAN'T TELL..!!
WHO'S THE ALIEN IN THE PICTURE??!!..I CAN'T TELL..!! jay2180
  • Score: 0

9:12pm Thu 21 Mar 13

lmddjs says...

Not sure if mentally ill or a charlatan... Either way it's poor journalism. If they are delusions you are 1. validating them, 2. putting her in the public eye to be mocked.
Not sure if mentally ill or a charlatan... Either way it's poor journalism. If they are delusions you are 1. validating them, 2. putting her in the public eye to be mocked. lmddjs
  • Score: 0

11:49am Fri 22 Mar 13

banjo8 says...

I get your point about the journalism, but not sure there's anything wrong with being in the public eye and being mocked, several people have made a real career out of it - Lembit Opik, Paris Hilton, Mark Wright to name but three.
I get your point about the journalism, but not sure there's anything wrong with being in the public eye and being mocked, several people have made a real career out of it - Lembit Opik, Paris Hilton, Mark Wright to name but three. banjo8
  • Score: 0

12:27pm Fri 22 Mar 13

hereallweek says...

rescaaffering oldey wrote:
hereallweek wrote:
And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed.
...sussed you a long time ago 'tom' still... keeping your brains where the monkey keeps his nuts!! rofl!! :)
Hi. This isn't 'Tom'.
[quote][p][bold]rescaaffering oldey[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]hereallweek[/bold] wrote: And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed.[/p][/quote]...sussed you a long time ago 'tom' still... keeping your brains where the monkey keeps his nuts!! rofl!! :)[/p][/quote]Hi. This isn't 'Tom'. hereallweek
  • Score: 0

3:39pm Fri 22 Mar 13

Gypo.Joe says...

hereallweek wrote:
rescaaffering oldey wrote:
hereallweek wrote:
And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed.
...sussed you a long time ago 'tom' still... keeping your brains where the monkey keeps his nuts!! rofl!! :)
Hi. This isn't 'Tom'.
We all know you're Spartacus now 'Tom'.
[quote][p][bold]hereallweek[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]rescaaffering oldey[/bold] wrote: [quote][p][bold]hereallweek[/bold] wrote: And you ran this load of old boll ocks because she happened to get air time on TV. Pathetic. Frankly it deserves no better comment than that. The irony is the comment, rather than the story will be removed.[/p][/quote]...sussed you a long time ago 'tom' still... keeping your brains where the monkey keeps his nuts!! rofl!! :)[/p][/quote]Hi. This isn't 'Tom'.[/p][/quote]We all know you're Spartacus now 'Tom'. Gypo.Joe
  • Score: 0

4:16pm Fri 22 Mar 13

banjo8 says...

No, I'm Spartacus, I mean Tom, no wait, I forgot, I'm actually an alien.
No, I'm Spartacus, I mean Tom, no wait, I forgot, I'm actually an alien. banjo8
  • Score: 0

7:39pm Sat 23 Mar 13

gabbygetsme says...

Not sure why this person has been given airtime on tv or on here but clearly I can understand why she is a former police woman, clearly not right in the head to be an officer aliens my foot. What nonsense.

Next she will be saying that Cameron really has a double who is an alien runs the country or that the reason for Osborne's huge stomach isn't because he is overweight but houses a member of the treasurer his second in command George Alien to be his confidante. Personally, I think this lady should be in the Queen Elizabeth Hospital for assessment under section 3 of the mental health act. I believe it's 28 days and if she still believes there are aliens communciating with her, she can then be detained for a further 6 months under section 2 of the same act. Might get rid of her aliens and that awful hair colouring.
Not sure why this person has been given airtime on tv or on here but clearly I can understand why she is a former police woman, clearly not right in the head to be an officer aliens my foot. What nonsense. Next she will be saying that Cameron really has a double who is an alien runs the country or that the reason for Osborne's huge stomach isn't because he is overweight but houses a member of the treasurer his second in command George Alien to be his confidante. Personally, I think this lady should be in the Queen Elizabeth Hospital for assessment under section 3 of the mental health act. I believe it's 28 days and if she still believes there are aliens communciating with her, she can then be detained for a further 6 months under section 2 of the same act. Might get rid of her aliens and that awful hair colouring. gabbygetsme
  • Score: 1

8:52am Mon 25 Mar 13

banjo8 says...

Personally I find gabbygetsme more worrying than Stephany. Whatever the hair colouring.
Personally I find gabbygetsme more worrying than Stephany. Whatever the hair colouring. banjo8
  • Score: -1

3:17pm Wed 3 Apr 13

CYNIC_AL says...

Arsene Wenger's been on another planet for years. Maybe this lady is on to something...
Arsene Wenger's been on another planet for years. Maybe this lady is on to something... CYNIC_AL
  • Score: 0

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