Research carried out by the National Childbirth Centre (NCT) and Calpol has found that there is limited post natal care available to new mums.

During this daunting time, nearly 40% of those surveyed felt that they needed someone to talk to about their feelings and practical issues after the birth.

It was also found that a new mum relies on her partner for essential emotional and social support showing that dads are playing an increasingly important role.

Other areas where support would have been appreciated include coping with a crying/colic baby, getting the baby to sleep, lack of sleep for mum and feeling low and depressed, each mentioned by around one in ten of those interviewed. This is the emphasis behind the new antenatal courses being offered by the NCT to empower men to be able to support their partners before, during and after childbirth.

Jazz and Amrit Rehal, both 31, of Windsor Crescent, South Harrow attended Parentcraft classes in preparation for the birth of their first child last September, but found they weren't very useful, so they decided to go on a weekend NCT antenatal course.

Jazz said: "The NCT course was brilliant because it places a strong emphasis on the role that your partner can play. It's very empowering because it gives men all the information they need to make them incredibly useful and supportive before, during and after the birth itself."

When Amrit arrived at the hospital she was already in labour but the doctors and midwives told her she wasn't. Amrit took charge and made the doctors take notice. He then whispered in her ear, "Close your eyes - don't open them, I'm here now."

For the next 13 hours of her 20-hour labour, she had her eyes closed and took every instruction from her husband. From the TENS machine he could see when the contraction was coming and he told her when and how to breathe.

There was trouble getting the baby out and rather than panic her, he whispered gently in her ear, "Trust me, everything is fine, if you give it one last push, you'll be there." And with that the 8Ib 12oz baby girl Shaan was born on September 26.

For a week and half after the birth, Jazz had baby blues and couldn't be on her own with Shaan. Some men would have found the situation very daunting but thanks to his extensive training Amrit was a tower of strength.

Jazz said: "Amrit was my rock. He would get up when I got up and sit with me all night as I tried to breast-feed. He also took as much strain off me as he could by doing the cooking and cleaning the house.

"He also understood that I needed some 'me' time so when he came in from work he would take the baby off me and send me off to have a hot bath or take a nap, which really helped me to cope.

"The course proved to be invaluable because it not only helped Amrit to understand what I was going through but also put me in touch with other local mothers who have been an extra network of support ever since.

"Having a baby is a wonderful experience- Shaan is now 15 months old and the light of my life- I'm just glad that I managed to get the support from my husband and the post-natal care to be able to get over my baby blues and enjoy being a new mum."

For information about NCT courses in your area contact the enquiries line on 0870 444 8707.

4:50pm Tuesday 17th December 2002

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