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The Cottage (18) **
Director: Paul Andrew Williams
With: Andy Serkis, Jennifer Ellison, Reece Shearsmith, Dave Legeno<

Watch the trailer here

The writer-director of acclaimed British crime thriller London to Brighton does a handbrake turn into comedy horror with harrowing results. Two brothers (Andy Serkis and The League of Gentlemen's Reece Shearsmith) have kidnapped the daughter of a mob boss and fled to the country. They're hoping for a big pay day; the locals have something else in mind. Solid performances from Serkis and Shearsmith can't disguise the thinness of the script. As for Jennifer Ellison, playing the kidnap victim, her cursing voice is the most hideous thing in the movie. Imagine a dozen caterwauling moggies abseiling down a blackboard, claws out, and you'll arrive at a whisper of the earache induced by the former Brookside belle.

12:01am Thursday 13th March 2008

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