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Calling all guardian angels
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| Dedicated: Mary Hurley at her Borehamwood home |
As Foster Care Fortnight draws to a close this week, the Fostering Network charity is urging more people to come forward as foster parents for the thousands of children in care.
Borehamwood single mother-of-two, Mary Hurley, has been fostering since July last year. With daughters aged 17 and 13, an addition to the family had to be carefully thought through.
She said: "I have two girls and it is something we thought about as a family a number of years ago. But the time was not right then because my daughters were very much into social activities and if you decide to foster you have to be prepared to be there all the time.
"But once we had moved into our new home and the girls had got a bit older we went back to look at the possibility again. Initially I saw adverts around like the one outside Allum Lane Community Centre. So I had a look on the website and filled in the inquiry form."
From here, Ms Hurley started Hertfordshire Fostering Service's six-week Skills to Fostering course, which gives a deeper insight into the role. She was then assigned a social worker who visited her home and discussed the possible scenarios she may have to face with a foster child.
She said: "I don't feel my family's life has changed. I had always felt that whichever child we got I would treat them as if they were my own. As an experienced parent I would say your skills and knowledge of parenting let you naturally assess a situation.
"We have a child who has fitted in exceptionally well to my family and extended family. I would like to believe they won't want to let go of the bond and the relationship they have with us even after they leave."
But Ms Hurley is still very aware of the uncertainty many people feel towards fostering. "I can understand people's reservations," she said. "I think sometimes we all think, myself included in the past, that children come into care for reasons because of abuse, neglect, crime, alcohol and drugs.
"I am not saying this does not happen, but sometimes children come into care because parents just can't cope, or by parents giving children up because it is the best thing for the child, or even because of bereavement.
"You don't know anything unless you ask and I would encourage people to find out what fostering is about, even if they are not ready to take it on themselves. They may feel that later on in life the time is right."
Her encouragement is echoed by Hertfordshire County Council's fostering service, which holds information days for those interested in taking on children in care.
Karen Devereux, head of the service, said: "We want people to recognise the qualities they've got. A lot of people have the skills needed for this role and we are there to develop them. Foster carers receive a weekly fee and generous allowances and we give them ongoing training and support."
In Hertfordshire alone, 550 foster families are currently looking after 740 children while their own parents are unable to take care of them.
Councillor Jane Pitman, the council's lead member for children's services, said: "Across the county, children's lives are dramatically improved thanks to the care and commitment of foster families. Fostering is hard work but the rewards are immense. A lot of people don't realise they can foster and we hope that more will come forward to offer children the chance of a brighter future."
Ms Hurley added: "Everyone in the household has to want to become involved in fostering, you have got to give 110 per cent commitment, it is a passion. It is a challenging job but very rewarding and I am enjoying it immensely."
u An information morning for people interested in fostering will be held in Borehamwood at the Maxwell Park Community Centre on Thursday May 29 from 10am.
For more information call 0800 917 0925 or visit
www.hertsdirect.org/fostering.
12:19pm Tuesday 20th May 2008
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CommentPosted by: with held, b/wood on 10:23am Wed 21 May 08
I would love to give my veiws not on the foster parents, but the way childrens schools and familys, analise who is in urgent need of Fostering, or which child can stay with extended family. In our case my grandson was going to be fostered, with out our nowing We have had to fight through the courts to stop this happening, how many other familys have gone through this. I am not saying all children are able to stay with family but We were not given the correct information on what to do. We are still under the eye of CSF until late this year when they decide if we are doing a good job, so I cant comment to much. But exstended family should be sort first and given the help and understanding they need. If the child had been fostered we wold only have been aloud to see them one hour a fourtnight as we aere only grand parents, this would have been more harm than good, so please before fostering look at the family first. Well done Mary Hurley, for taking on this hard but rewarding task.
I would love to give my veiws not on the foster parents, but the way childrens schools and familys, analise who is in urgent need of Fostering, or which child can stay with extended family. In our case my grandson was going to be fostered, with out our nowing We have had to fight through the courts to stop this happening, how many other familys have gone through this. I am not saying all children are able to stay with family but We were not given the correct information on what to do. We are still under the eye of CSF until late this year when they decide if we are doing a good job, so I cant comment to much. But exstended family should be sort first and given the help and understanding they need. If the child had been fostered we wold only have been aloud to see them one hour a fourtnight as we aere only grand parents, this would have been more harm than good, so please before fostering look at the family first. Well done Mary Hurley, for taking on this hard but rewarding task.
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